It’s that time of year again.
Parties, gatherings, coffee dates and visits.
Catching up with friends and family, and celebrating.
Every year around the holidays I meet up with my girlfriends from college and we exchange ornaments.
This is typically the only time I see them and look forward to it all year long.
Despite only seeing each other once a year, we pick up right where we left off as if no time has passed.
These friendships are low maintenance and come purely from a place of love.
We don’t have “manuals” for one another, or wish each other were different in any way.
There’s no ranting, complaining, gossiping, confrontation or jealousy.
Sure, we all have things going on in our lives but everyone has the choice of how to think about these circumstances.
We can choose to think thoughts that will serve us and create better results, or we think negative thoughts and spread them like wildfire to everyone we see.
It’s up to us.
I’ve had friendships where I’d leave visits with high anxiety and a buzzing head from listening to heavy, negative talk for hours.
That’s not a feeling I want to trade my time for.
I’m not saying that you should ignore the pain your friend is going through. But I’ve learned to ask myself this- if I had the ability to solve their problem or change their situation for the better, would they just think of something else to complain about?
I’ve done this.
I wanted my friend to stop feeling pain.
I solved their problems.
I created solutions.
I answered their prayers.
And you know what? It took five minutes for a new rant to start.
It wasn’t until then that I realized some people prefer to be unhappy.
Not me though.
I like being happy and having a circle of friends who don’t make my brain hurt.
I prefer to leave a get-together with my shoulders relaxed and have cheeks that hurt from laughing.
How do you like to feel?
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